You know you haven't been hiking enough. ..

“when you follow the directions to measure your torso length and can't find the top of your hip bones to determine your iliac crest.”

“When you wear your "hiking boots" more to work or doing errands than actually using them on the trail.”

“when you can write your name on the dust that's collected on your backpack”

“Oh no, you nailed me on both of those.”

“When, through the wonders of caller I.D., your local outfitter has stopped taking your calls...
:o(”

“Hasn't happened to me yet, thank goodness. Gotta empty my pack and air the sleeping and bivy bags. Happy trails (get on out there).”

“You read MUTT's posts.”

“LOL Le Subtil!”

“When your only time spent in the outdoors are spent quickly walking to class.

When the only wildlife you encounter on a regular basis are gray squirrels and maybe a mouse or two.”

“When you no longer have a reserved parking space at the trail head.”

“Testing out your sleeping bag in the backyard for one night, and the next night looks good too.”

“When the campfire singed hair on the back of your hand regrows to a noticable length.”

“...when Skinny Kenny starts lookin like a rock rat.”

“...when the fuel in your stove has evaporated or gone bad.

...when you thristy for the trip reports form others.

...when you look back over your old hiking photos and think of the time when....

...when your bank account has grown.

....when Friday/Saturday night and the Sunday morning shows on TV are looking better all the time.”

“When you start the count down to your next trip at T-minus 30 days.”

“there is stuff on TV on friday and saturday?”

“...when you look like a third base coach giving the bunt sign, when looking for stuff in the myriad of pockets you are wearing.”

“When you Ol Lady says:"Why don't you go hiking or something your ill as H E double hockey sticks!”

“LOL,”

“...when you start to become jealous of "Survivors."”

“when you're white!”

“When you take your pack out of the closet and just run your hands over it, opening pockets for the pure joy of it and finally sticking yer head in the main compartment and drawing a deep, invigorating breath!”

“When you find a clump of dirt in your pack, leftover from the last trip, and trinkle it over your salad and relish every bite.”

“...when Sarabelle starts lookin a little chubby.”

“o-8=


THAT'S IT, YOU BASSTURD!


jus wait til you get home!”

“a bass turd?”

“When you've got all your gear spread out in the basement and are cataloging it for the 3rd time.”

“Yes.
It's fish doodoo.”

“...when your gear is CLEAN

...when you read yourself to sleep with the Gear Guide 2000 'cuz the #$@% 2001 hasn't come in yet

...when you have absolutely no cuts, bumps, bruises, bangs, scrapes, sprains or contusions anywhere on your body.”

“When all the catalogs start coming in and you're dying to buy some new hiking toys even though you have tons of it already.”

“When you take your pack to work loaded down to take a walk in the park around your building!

When your employees stop asking "so, what trail was it last weekend?"

When your employees walk by and don't see maps on your desk.”

“When portaging your canoe down the 200-yard path from the parking area to the river starts getting called a hike.”

“When you move your pile of sandstone rocks to your desk near your computer and dig out your mashed piece of sagebrush, close your eyes and savor the smell of the desert.”

“When you start exaggerating and call a 100-yard portage 200 yards.”

“There are more maps on your walls than wall space in your house...

You fall asleep studying the trail guide for your next hike every night... even though it's 5 months from now!”

“5 months?!?!?!? oh, man... i almost fainted....”

“Yeah... :-( It sucks!!! Spring Break Raddy, the kids are gone for a week & I'm going hiking no matter what!
Okay, I guess it's more like 2 months now until I get a quick overnighter! :-) 5 months for the longer trips... why does it have to take so long??? Aaaarrgh!!! 8-O”

“When the closest thing to hiking is just reading about it.”

“When you're out of breath from walking up steps.”

“When you pitch your tent in the living room and watch television while in it.....”

“when you start planning an AT hike AHHHHHHHHHHg thats one long hike!!!!”

“Your my hero MOM!”

“When you carry your new GPS to work, shopping etc because you got it as a gift and can't wait to get 'out-there' with it.
Or, when you start cross posting from one thread to another on Trail Talk.
*Cough* Le Subtil* Ashcroft thread* cough*”

“Yes, Barlo? What? I'm not going back there!!! (ok, I did but I'm not going back again)

A guy I work with got a GPS for Christmas. He says "look at this" and shows me the points he had plotted from walking around the plant all day.”

“When you 3 times as much BP'ing food stored up as you do vacation time.”

“When you *have*...”

“Keep threatening to take the tent down to the nearest campground just to be able to sleep outside where the temperature is only 20 degrees at night, instead of 05.
When you open up the containers that held the last of your food from the last trip, and the food has molded, dried up, and nearly disappeared.”

“...When you come to Trail Talk.”

“When you start, read, or post to a thread like this one.

D'OH!”

“LOL”