Living in 2001

“SIGNS YOU LIVE IN THE YEAR 2001.............
1. You just tried to enter your password on the
microwave.

2. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach
your family of three.

3. You call your son's beeper to let him know
it's time to eat. He e-mails you back from his
bedroom, "What's for dinner?"

4. Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via
her web site.

5. You chat several times a day with a stranger
from South Africa, but you haven't spoken with
your next door neighbor yet this year.

6. You check the ingredients on a can of chicken
noodle soup to see if it contains Echinacea.

7. Your grandmother asks you to send her a JPEG
file of your newborn so she can create a screen saver.

8. You pull up in your own driveway and use your
cell phone to see if anyone is home.

9. Every commercial on television has a website
address at the bottom of the screen.

10. You buy a computer and 6 monthslater it is out
of date and now sells for half the price you paid.

11. Leaving the house without your cell phone,
which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 years of your
life, is cause for panic and turning around to go get it.

12. Using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make
a purchase would be a hassle and take planning.

13. Cleaning up the dining room means getting the fast
food bags out of the back seat of your car.

14. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that
they do not have e-mail addresses.

15. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.


16. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.

17. Your idea of being organized is multiple-colored Post-it notes.

18. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.

19. You get an extra phone line so you can get phone calls.

20. You disconnect from the internet and get this awful feeling,
as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

21. You get up in morning and go online before getting your coffee.

22. You wake up at 2am to go to the bathroom and check your
E-mail on your way back to bed.

23.You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)

24. You're reading this.

25. Even worse; you're going to forward it to someone else.”

“Fox Network is adding another "reality" program to its 2001 schedule. "Addiction Island" will feature recovering addicts on a remote island who will be tempted with unlimited drugs, alcohol and, as an added bonus, prostitutes with sexually transmittable diseases.

"Addiction Island" begins airing on Sunday nights at 8pm which Fox executives deemed an appropriate hour for a television program aimed at families. "This will be a show of true drama as we intimately follow former addicts while they struggle in the face of an unlimited buffet of crack, cocaine, heroin, marijuana, beer and hard liquor," said FOX program director Rick Rockwell.

FOX denied accusations from TV critics of airing tasteless, exploitative, mindless, prurient shows purely for ratings. "Okay, so maybe it isn't friggin' Masterpiece Theater, but we consider it wholesome entertainment in the great FOX tradition," Rockwell said before storming off.”

“5, 18, 20, 21, 22. I admit it. I do that, especially at school. I just leave my system on all the time with outlook open, so I've had the incomming mail sound wake me up and of course I checked it.”

“Walkindude, when did you see my dining room table? ;-)”

“Addiction Island..........now there would be a place that I would have a chance> I have never known anythng that I didn't like exploiting”

“I can say yes to 14 of them at some time or another.”

“How true!”