Bigfoot's Continuing Adventures Thread

“Here ya go, Big Guy... this'll save me from having to read 30 threads to see where the heck your stories and poems are showing up.

(I read somewhere you wrote about getting a snakebite...well, I never SAW that one!! I feel robbed....)

It'll be easy to find later on, too, have'm together.

OH YEAH........ and anyone who THINKS he or she might just rob some of these stories and put your name on it. FORGET IT!!! They are copyrighted by Bigfoot.

Thank me later........ heheeehe.

But seriously, I do hope you post here. I love reading your stories and poems.

:-)”

“Wow, Thanks Lizs!”

“Now the pressure's on bud! LOL”

“I grew up in the country and all the boys around there used to come camp with my brother and me. We had the best times way back up in the hills behind our place. No one lived anywhere around there for miles and miles and we pretty much had it to ourselves. All the boys lived on farms too and they`d bring fresh eggs, milk, smoke cured hams and this one boy always brough ribs and steaks his daddy would give us. Sometimes we`d have chickens to fry up, porkchops and smoked hot links too and we always had fresh stuff out of the gardens as well. We ate like kings, well,.. more like pigs, but we had the times of our lives.

We had our camp on the other side of the Blue Bayou creek and we could just jump out of the tent and be in the best swimin` hole on the whole thing. We all had horses and we`d ride off up in the hills and explore new places and get into all kinds of stuff. There were some old house places off up there and there used to even be an old store there too. It was our ghost town, even if it was just three old houses and a store, it was enough for us. There was a world of junk off up there too and we`d look for treasures off in there once in a while. I found an old box of stuff and in it was rings and ear rings and an old gold pocket watch. Dad had the watch worked on and it kept good time too. We were doing stuff like that again off up there when We found an old cave, or we thought it was a cave. We didn`t have a light with us, but I got a pine knot and we got that lit and we were good to go. I got to go first for some reason, they`d let me if they thought there was any chance of snakes and stuff because I wasn`t afraid of them. The opening was washed out pretty bad, but if didn`t fall down when we gave it a few good kicks to test it out. We didn`t know anything about caves, but we thought that was a good enough test to see if it`d come down. I got off up in it and took a look around, there wasn`t much to see, but I could tell it went back in there for a good ways. I got them to come along and we went further back in and there was old iron tools and boxes of stuff in there. We didn`t hang out in it that long and got the heck back out of it. A few more trips back up there and we were off in there again and this time we went to looking in the boxes, thinking we`d find something we could blow stuff up with. Nope, most of the boxes were empty and others had picks and old pipes in `em, but we found one box that had jars of stuff. We had up and found us three jars of moon shine and turns out it was almost as much fun as blowing up stuff. We took it back with us and hid it off for use later that night. Now, my dad almost never came back there to check on us, but it was like he could tell if we were up to much and he`d just show up there. That`s the reason we decided to wait till dark, that way we`d be able to see him if he was to try. We got supper up and going good and we ate till we all about died and we still had stuff. It took forever to get dark that evening so, we decided to go for a swim and just clown around. We were having a large time and darkness caught us still playing in the creek. We got out and built up the fire and went to passing that jar of shine around. I never had drank before and I didn`t much want to and my brother and another boy didn`t much care for it either. They threw a fit till we gave it a try and then they left us alone. Man that stuff burned all the way down and I was snockers just from the one hit I had. Some of them boys was going at the stuff like they were used to it, but it didn`t take long till it wiped `em out too. Wouldn`t you know it, there up on the hill was headlights comin` down through the pasture right towards us. You talk about freaking out, we all went to trying to hide. It took a while for `em to reach us and when they did they were on the other side of the creek. No one said a word as we heard the horn honk, we weren`t about to give up our hiding place and take a beating. Again the horn blows and still we stay put, then I see someone go in front of the fire towards the car. He steps in front of the headlights and it`s my dad, he`s been in camp all that time and just hid and watched us. We couldn`t hear what he was saying to my mother, but she left in a bit and he came back to the fire and called us all out. I would have run away, but he was between me and my horse and I knew he`d kill me if he ever caught me so I went too. He had us go get the other two jars of shine and give `em to him. He went and cut him a switch and he set in working on us boys till he had the mess of us in tears. Heck, I was crying long before he got around to me, but he didn`t let that stop him none. Some of the boys thought they could talk him out of a whipping,.. boy, they sure don`t know that man. He gets done with that and goes and builds up the fire some and stays over there. We all go to talking about him, but in whispers, afraid he`ll hear us and set in on us again. We all about get over it and decide we`re going to live, when we see lots of headlights comin` over the hill towards us. One ol` boy up and says they done called the law on us and another boy says you wish, that`s my dad`s truck and yours right in there behind `em. We just thought my dad was mad, they got out and the beatings started all over again. Well, not to be out done my dad grabs up my brother and me and works us over again. They make us all go to bed and the they stay up and finish off the food we`d left and they go to cooking up a bunch more. Then they get off into the other two jars of that shine. They end up making a party out of it and stay the night riding herd on us. The next morning they have us up and breaking stuff down and headed to the house. It`s Sunday morning and they make us all go to Chirch.
Well, we asked for it and we was having to pay for it now. All of us boys were setting together and we got to laughing about it all and this old lady behind us would slap the fool out of the backs of our heads. Well, that would just make the rest of us that haddn`t been laughing start in and then she`d go to slapping those and the other boys would crack up.
I think it was about my third time of getting slapped that the preacher and some other men got us up out of our seats and took us all outside. We just got kicked out of Church and we all started laughing about that, till we looked up and saw our dads coming out the back doors of the Church.

It`s a wonder I ever drank again after that, but I did, I was thirty six years old the next time I took a drink.”

“This is your book big guy. Now get started!”

“Lizs,
sweet one, what am I supposed to do here? I don`t guess I know what you want.”

“What book? I just had a few great times and most of `em I can`t even tell you about. They don`t know for sure it was me!LOL”

“Bigfoot you have enough stories inside that head of yours for several books.

And as a general observation it's no wonder Southerners make the best writers. As kids we get to stay outside all year doing stuff. Poor old New Yorkers and Midwesterners are still all huddled inside around the radiator trying to stay warm. LOL!!!!!”

“Better yet BF write a animated childs book with a "bigfoot" as the main character or maybe develope a slew of forest dwelling characters with human characteristics. Just convey a positve message. A story with a twist or a moral punch line.”

“You're getting all kinds of ideas, huh??? lol!!

Have some fun :-)”

“I went for a hike, but there was a glitch
there in my way was this big old ditch
I eased on up to the edge for a better look at it
but, try as I might, I couldn`t fill `er with spit
someone left a ditch in my way, darn their hide
now how in the world will I get to the other side
it must have made others mad enough to have had a fit
cause running the length of the bottom was a river of spit
I`ve heard talk of a grand canyon, could it be true
and the next thing I see is our very own Cindy Lu
Cindy tells me she has had a great time, but she has to split
all wet she thinks it`s going to rain she didn`t know it was spit
well, Cindy won`t let me tell her story so, I guess I`m through
I didn`t mention me spitting, you won`t tell on me, will you”

“hahaaha!! Reminds me of a big ole folk tale there, Bigfoot. cute.”

“Here's some links on cowboy poetry:

Western Folklife Center

Cowboy Rudy

Oh, that's enough. Just testing my linking skills. OH WILL THEY WORK!!???”

“It`s strange that you would start something up like this for me when I`ve run out of things I can tell you about.

I grew up on a working farm and that`s what I know best and where most of my adventures started from. I`m as country as a rock and don`t mind it a bit, you knowing that. I wish I could have made a living that way, I`d still be living it and loving it too!

I grew up skinny dipping in the Blue Bayou and wondering the hills out in back of our place. It was a great place to grow up and there was always something to do. I learned to hunt, fish, swim, camp and do the things young
boys do.

I`m as good a rat hunter as you`ll come across and I can catch a bullfrog with a piece of cloth and a bit of string, but why tell you about it? You`d
just have to see it for yourself, or you wouldn`t know how to go about it.

I used to break horses for the folks around in our parts and I was good at it too. I could break any horse in less than a week an have it doing everything a working horse needs to know. I`d start `em off in the water with another horse leading them into the water until the horses were
swimming. I`d pull the new horse up to me and slide over on it`s back and with it swimming it couldn`t buck, or fall over backwards. I`d use my hand
and put it over the left eye and the horse would swim to the right. After a bit, I`d place my hand on his right eye and make him swim to the left, never
letting him hit dry ground. It doesn`t take long to wear down a scared horse by swimming it and he`ll get tired fast. When he starts to falter and he will, you have to swim along side him or he`ll go under. When He reaches shallow water you better be back up on him. His legs will feel like lead and about gone to rubber too and he`ll be a bit shaky for a time. Most of `em don`t want to run, or buck or anything, they just want to walk around and catch their breath. The horse doesn`t fear you now and doesn`t much mind you being there and the big part of it is done. He hasn`t been hurt and he
has never learned to buck. It`s all good, but it`s the way Indians used to break their horses and they knew a thing or two.

There`s almost as many ways
to break horses as there are kinds of horses. Well, some people aren`t half as smart as a horse and they think it`s best to buck `em out, till he horse just gives it up as a bad habit.

That`s all well and good for me, I love that stuff, but it`s hard on a horse and makes some of `em all but killers. If a horse ever gets good at bucking, it`ll do it anywhere, always, sometimes, down to who would have thunk it.
I hate a cold back horse, it`s where you can get a rig on him and maybe ride `em off and nothing`ll happen and the next time you start to rope off
of him or just want to ride, he`ll come undone on you and show you some country side. I`ve had them bring me the sure enough killers too and the horses will bite you and stomp you in the ground. They`ll run away with you
too and nothing you do can stop the rubber neck suckers, the best you can hope for is to turn him around and around till he gets tired of it and hope he doesn`t kill the both of you going through a fence, or up under some
trees. I`ve even had a run away line up on a tree or telephone pole and run us smack into it. Those poor horses have been mistreated and got the better
of the ones trying to hurt them. It`s mighty hard to ever turn one of those kinds of horses around and earn his trust.

Maybe you didn`t need to know all that, but I had a killer given to me and he was the best looking horse I`d ever laid eyes on. He wasn`t a true killer, he had gotten two different people down and put them into a hospital
and one of `em he almost did kill. The guy that owned him was going to shoot him because those weren`t the first ones he`d hurt, but he was getting mean, real mean. I loved him as much as he hated me, well,..I don`t know, he sure hated me a lot.

I tried every trick in the book to get him to like me, I was nice to him, that didn`t work. I played rough with him, he loved that, he even showed me some stuff I`d never seen before. We tore up more stuff, skinned us and some trees up and rode down more fence and broke more new ground than I can even
think to tell you about. Dad decided we`d just have to soap him out and that about killed me to think about it. I got him to give us just one more chance
before he did and it about got us both killed.

For the umpteenth time I drug that sucker into the pond, with him fighting me and the horse I was on every bit of the way. I had to run the horse I was on to keep us out from under him, he`d fly up on top of us if I`d slow down any. I`d never seen so much hate on a horses face before, the whites of his eyes were rolled out at me and he showed his teeth to me the whole time, his nose was flared and his ears were laid back. I`ve had a hold of some rank
mules in my day and had some of `em get ahold of me too, but they couldn`t hold a light to this horse. Mules don`t want to get hurt, this horse just didn`t care he wanted to kill me, even if it killed him doing it. I got his
mean hide in the water and we went to swimming and I fell over on his back. We went round and round that pond and I thought I`d wear him down for sure. While we were doing this folks started coming out of the wood work to see
us. Things like this get around in a small town and it seemed like everyone was showing up. It took forever but he began to falter and start to struggle to stay above water. I eased off to his side and let him make his
way towards shore. I hauled back up on him as he found his feet up under him and all Hell broke lose. He almost ran over everyone standing there watching and went to chasing my brother. My brother was fast as a cat and he flew
into the back of the truck with us right in there behind him. We were in and out of the back of that truck like shot, still hot on the heels of my brother and me doing all I could to stop, or slow the horse down. Well, me
hauling back on the horse and brother running for his life took us to a fence and as brother went under it, we flew over it and we`d got ahead of my brother. Two fences later that old horse forgot all about my brother and was doing his best to just kill me. We were going along there pretty as you please, just bucking and cutting up and the world turned upside down on me.
I couldn`t move, the horse had fallen in a creek and we were pinned together and wedged tight.
I was now under the horse with my head at his side, his head was around by my side that was out. His legs were clawing at the air and the more he`d struggle the more we`d go down in the creek bed and the tighter it got on us,
till he couldn`t move any more.
There wasn`t much water in the creek, but what there was, was now backing up because of us and it was getting colder and higher all the time. It seemed like forever before anyone got to us and they wouldn`t have then, but they heard me screaming for all I was worth. By the time they got there the water was over the horses nose and I was pulling up on his head trying to keep it
out of the water. It was bad, he was getting weaker and weaker and more and more water was going down his throat. The water was almost to my chin now and they had to work at it to keep my head out of the water too.

My brother went to bailing water with his hat fast as he could and another guy had my head trying to keep me out of the water, but pull as much as they might, they couldn`t pull me out from under the horse, or the horse up off of me. Well, dad and the rest of my brothers made it there and they set in trying to free us too, but it didn`t help a bit. More of my brothers and some men that had gathered started bailing water, trying to keep me from going under. I kept worrying about the horse and they`d help him too when they though of it. This went on for over a half an hour and someone had gone and got a tractor and a bunch of ropes. Someone else had gone and got some shovels too and they set in trying to dig us out, but tree roots were keeping them from getting very far with it. They rigged up some ropes to the horse`s feet and tied it off to the tractor and took up the slack. Three tries and the horse came free and they hauled me up out of the creek too. It just cracked some of my ribs and beat me up a bit, but it took three days before I could breathe good at all. Dad haddn`t killed the horse as he`d said he would. I went out to check on him and he didn`t look to be in much better shape than I was. He was looking poor and gaunt from the deal and his head just slumped over as he stood on the far side of the stall. I could see where the ropes had skinned his ankles up pretty good and they looked to be swollen. I went and got a rope and pitched a loop over his head and drew him up to the side of the stall so I could get a better look at him. I got some of that blue dope you put on cuts and worked it in on his cuts and I finished it off with some of that black smear that keeps flies off. A few days later he looked a lot better and he walked up to the side of the stall and met me as I walked up. I caught him up and got the saddle on him and decided to give him another try. I eased up on him expecting him to come undone on me, but he just fell back and tried to jump out from under me. I was more than half way up on him when he did it so, I just hauled myself on up and hung on. We went round and round for just a bit, but it wasn`t anything like the stuff he used to do. Maybe he was sore too and just didn`t feel like giving it his all, but for some reason, he just gave up and stood there breathing as easy as if we haddn`t done a thing. I sat there not knowing what was going through his mind, but willing to leave him alone and us just rest a bit. He made the next move, he just walked off as pretty as you please and even turned when he came up to the fence, any other time he`d have sailed us over it, or through it. I`d loved to have scratched my head about then, but I wasn`t about to turn lose of the death grip I had on things. I kicked him up a bit and he fell into a short lope and traveled off like we`d been doing this all our lives. I eased back on the reins and shure enough, he pulled up and slid down to a full stop. I couldn`t believe my luck so I decided to temp fait a bit more and leaned out as I took in slack on the left side of the bits. He fell over to the left so fast I thought he was going to start in fishtailing again, but he didn`t, he just let up as soon as I did. I tried it to the right and he fell off that way. Wow, power steering and power brakes, I couldn`t believe it was the same horse. He started trusting me, long before I ever got to where I could breathe easy with him. He took to me roping off him and to working cows as if he`d been doing it all his life. With out a doubt, he made one of the best horses I`d ever thrown a leg across. Later he saved my life once when he got between me and a bull that I`d roped off. When that loop settled onto that bulls horns, I got set up for the drop the bull should have done when he hit the end of the rope, but it never came. The bull pulled the horse out from under me and left me high and dry, trying to catch air with my hands as I came back to Earth. Like a good cowboy that always lands on his feet, I landed on my head and wasn`t sure where I was or what. I about got to where I could see again for all the stars that were going off in my head, when I glimpse the bull bearing down on me. I can`t get my feet to work, but my mouth is having no trouble at all and I scream for all I`m worth. Just as the bull is about to plant me into orbit again, my horse steps in front of me and spins to kick the bull. I`d never seen anything like that before in my life and by the looks of it the bull haddn`t either. I get my feet to working and haul out in front of my horse and the bull makes another run at us, but the horse kicks him again, but this time the bull gets a horn into the crotch of my horse and splits him from crotch to tail. Now my brothers make it to us and so does dad with the trailer to haul the bull away. They can`t drag the bull into the trailer by themselves so, I have to tie my horse back into it and we get the bull loaded up. It`ll take three months to heal up my horse, with the vet coming out every other day to give him shots and to restitch him back up. What a horse and that wasn`t the only time he saved my life either.

It just goes to show you, you shouldn`t rush to give up on anything. Some things just take time to work out and can mean all the difference in your life later on down the road.”

“Well, that`s what me trying to check the spelling will get. I cut the first part out and checked the spelling and then put it back. Oh well, it`s from the mistakes that I`ve learned the most anyway, I don`t know why I thought this would be any different!LOL”

“Hey, Thanks for the links there, Lizs!

I`ll have to go give `em a look see and see if I can do any of it.

Thanks Dude!

Solitary Hiker, you`ve got that right, as country kids growing up in the South we had to find our own fun. Hide and seek at night off horse back, catching fire flies and putting `em in a mason jar and some we`d use for war paint. Flying bumble bees and june bugs and frog giggin were just a part of growing up. Trail rides, hay rides and working cattle were just things kids woke up to.... maybe I`ve got one or two more stories left to tell!LOL

Rabbit, funny you should say that, my sister teaches and I write stories for her class. They seem to love my made up stuff and I would like to do more of that kind of thing. I love kids and love to make `em laugh. After all, I`m still a kid myself!LOL”

“Bravo Big Foot. When are you gonna get 'em published? Does anybody out there know how to go about it? I don't know anything about the business, but I know what I like to read. This stuff is great!”

“I got this from Big Foot, and thought I'd share it with all of you who might enjoy the story... Here goes... (ObiWan)

From Bigfoot:

I could tell you stories about horses forever, but you`d get real sick of `em so, this is the last one I`ll tell you.

This horse trader friend of my dad - Mack - kept us in new horse flesh all the time. It seemed like him and two other men my dad ran with had horses over at our place every week. I"d get fifty dollars for breaking a bad one gone mean, but only ten for most horses. It doesn`t sound like much money now, but it was a lot of money in the early sixties and most weeks I`d make $60-100. Not bad money for just after school and weekends and great money for a young boy. Of course I didn`t get to keep any of the money, I had to give it all to my dad.

Well, one day Mack brings a load of horses over to the house and tells me he`ll give me a hundred dollars if I`ll work the rough edges off this one horse he has. I think I said yes before he even got the words out of his mouth. Well, there`s a flaw in me I can`t seem to get away from, if I tell someone I`ll do something, I`ll bust a gut doing it.

Mack goes to unloading his string of horses and doesn`t have to point out to me which one it is. A blind man could tell it? "Baldy" is kicking and pawing with his front legs, and trying to take a bite out of anything that gets close to it. You talk about a pretty horse, he was light red, with a light mane and tail, socks on each foot, and a piebald face.

Mack gets them in the pen and tells me he`d love to have Baldy back by the weekend. That`s when Mack tells me everyone in the county has had him Baldy, and now, it's MY turn. Turns out the horse has thrown more folks than most good rodeo horses have. My brother, Jim, and I go about getting the horses some feed and fresh water, and a bit of hay put out as well. We get side tracked for a bit with a rat hunt as we`re getting the feed. I run the rat out and Jim misses him good ? I start in and give Jim a hard time about that.

Jim can`t find the rat to run him out so, telling me I couldn`t hit it anyway, go ahead and try. Well, though all I have is a homemade bow and some five-cent wooden arrows, I can hit, and Jim knows it. Jim says I bet you can`t even hit my hand if I was to hold it out like this and jerk it back real fast. He tries it once just for effect, and I don`t get my bow up fast enough. He tries it again, and this time, I`m ready for him. I let fly with that five and dime arrow of mine and drill a pea-size hole in his hand, through a corn sack, and into the side of the barn. Jim went to jumping around like a chicken with his head cut off, but skewered tied to the barn like he was, well, he didn`t get very far.

I yanked the arrow out of the wall and the sack without much problem, but getting it out of his hand wasn`t that easy to do. Funny thing, though? it didn`t bleed much at all. That is, until I pulled the arrow out. We told the folks he`d got a nail in it, and that seemed to satisfy them. Jim wasn't nearly so forgiving? First he taunts me, and now, he was mad at me because I was a good shot. Brothers.

The next day we start in and try to work on that string of horses we just got. Jim`s hand was all swollen up and so was his temper. He didn`t want to help me, but dad made him. We tried every trick we knew on that killer we had and nothing was working for us. Dad got mad at us and wanted me to tie him off short to one horse and let Jim lead the killer as I slid off on his back. We get it out and going off just fine, till I slip off on his back and he starts trying to get on the horse behind Jim, with me on top of him. Jim gets pretty sick of this real fast and decides to pay me back for last evening. We get off out of sight of the house and into the peach orchard behind the dope shed, and Jim really starts playing out some rope. The more he plays out, the harder the horse I`m on goes to bucking. Well in no time flat the horse is going at it with a true purpose, and trying his best to rid himself of me. I get the feeling of flying there for just a bit and then the ground comes up to meet me and I see stars. The next thing I know I`m under the hay in the corn crib and Jim is there smacking me over the head with a shovel, and I end up having to fight him off me. Jim sets into crying and then hugs my neck and starts going on about me being alive. Well, no thanks to Jim, that`s for sure.

It takes some doing and a lot of threats to get Jim to tell me what`s going on. I`m half dead and don`t even know why. I didn`t even remember trying to ride that horse. Jim tells all under protest and me twisting his bad hand a bit. Seems when the horse got me down, Jim just thought it was funny the way the horse was after me and all, and he just let Baldy have go at me. He only hauled the horse off me after I didn`t move any more and the fun wore off of it for Jim. He got the horses tied up and out of the way a bit, and decides he better go check on me. Jim can`t wake me up and thinks he`s gotten me killed so, he tries to bury me out there in the hard ground of the peach orchard. Jim then decides he has to hide my body so dad or no one else sees me till he can hide what he has done. He gets his horse and the rope and ties it around my feet and rides his horse up into the corn crib, dragging me right along behind him like a sack of corn. He then hides me under some hay while he goes and digs a hole to bury me in. As he returns to haul me out - rope tied tightly around my ankles - I go to moving. This freaks Jim out and he goes to beating me over the head with the shovel.

Jim was scared out of his mind believing I was more dead than alive, and he was just wanting over with it. It turns out Baldy just stomped me into the ground good, broke a lot of my ribs and tore my scalp and ears almost off my head. Or, could that have been Jim with the shovel? That and some loose teeth was about all I got out of it. Jim never let that happen to me again, I never told on him, and he never told on me either.

Aren`t brothers the best? They`ll keep your secrets till you die. Just watch out for Jim and that shovel!”

“Thanks Mather!
It makes me happy if anyone likes them and that`s good enough for me.

Thanks a lot Obi Wan!
Now I got a better idea what they`re supposed to look like!LOL

I didn`t mean for you to have to go to all that trouble.”

“No tribble a'tall”

“wow, quite the adventure stories, footsie!

...brings back some of my own fond(and certainly less dramatic) memories of swimming horses.

Thanks for sharing. :o)”

“Great idea for a thread Lizs. If we keep after Big Foot long enough, maybe he'll remember us little folk when he's shilling his book(s) on Oprah.

Big Foot, I'm still going to work up that one tale for you, just have been swamped here at school. But your horse stories are grand.”

“Great stories BF!”

“Thanks AmyG!

Pekka Thank You too!
I`m in no hurry for that right now and I don`t know for sure if it`d help.

PedXing Thank you!

I`ll never be a writer, but it makes me happy when you can find something you like in my junk. I wish I had more I could share with you, to in some small way pay you back for the fun you`ve given me.

Thanks for the fun!”

“Big Foot, Horses are gentle by nature. I've never seen bad animals, just bad owners. I've gotten through to tough horses with kind words, gentle but firm hands, and an occasional treat.

Bad horses result from abusive treatment from prior owners. There are some people out there that think their horses need a 2x4 over their head to straighten them out. It's no wonder there are "crazy" horses out there.

I'm sure you must have seen lots of "tough" guys out there that think they have to beat up a horse or break his spirit to train him or her.”

“Yes I have and there`s no need for it, they are afraid of us and it just takes a bit of trust to win `em over. I`ve seen women afraid of men too and men afraid of their wives. We all could learn a little and take it easy with others and things and have much more in our lives than we do.”

“BF, It's too bad that animals aren't held in a higher regard. They add so much joy to the lives of people that love them.

I know, I know, here I go again on one of my "love the animal speeches".”

“You`re right LH, it`s a shame, but even worse that human life isn`t valued either.”

“BF, it's just like wanting an animal to love you, teenagers want kids to love and to love them, but don't realize the work it takes to care for these animals & children that are dependent on them. These young girls with fantasies thinking that a baby will make things right. The children end up with their parents or grandparents to care for them. Anyone can have children, but not everyone can be a good parent.

These unwanted children are our criminals today. They are the ones that take their anger out on society. What ever happened to happy families? Were there ever happy families? How can we expect children to grow up to be good citizens with no guidence?

With divorce statistics so high, how does a kid stand a chance of growing up in a loving home? There are too many questions with no good answers.

I'm sorry to get too heavy, but that's what happens when I chat at night, lol.”

“Sorry BF, I'm screwing up your story telling thread here, I'll stop & continue talking with you on ICQ if you're around.”

“BF, since I don't see you on ICQ now, I'll catch you another time. My cold/allergy/bronchitis has me worn out early this evening.

I wanted to update you on my neighbor. He's been diagnosed with Attention Deficet Disorder and is receiving counseling. I hope they have gotten him in time before he burns down my apt. bldg.”

“LH, you didn`t mess anything up writing on here. This isn`t my thread, or just for me. If it was I wouldn`t write on it either.

I got busy doing stuff and haven`t been back on till now. I`m sorry I missed you, I knew I haven`t been seeing you on much. I`m sorry you`ve been ill and I hope you get better real soon.

It is a shame what we do to others and our children because we don`t know any better, or just don`t care enough to do anything about it. Instead of talking to our children we at times talk at them, or down to them. If we don`t know the differance in the way we talk to them, what will they learn from it?

I`m about to get wound up so I better quit this too!LOL

I`ll catch you later on ICQ and we`ll get it all talked out!LOL”

“I have this little place down in the hard woods that I love to go
I can take my problems there and it helps me in ways I didn`t know
I go there when things bother me and I unload the things I got
I leave my burdens there and take away a memory, it hepls me a lot
things can pile up and seem to be choking all of the life out of me
I can go there and get away and see things the way they ought to be
I don`t go there much anymore, but I used to when things got bad
that place can`t right all the stuff, but it has helped me a tad
because I shared it with you all, doesn`t make it any less so
it`s a happy place for me in life and still where I like to go


I know a place back off in the hills, close to where I live and it makes me feel good every time I go there. I never seem to get there the same way, but in a more about round way. I`ll be in the woods for something else all together and have no intention of even going there, but the first thing I know it`s drawn me back to it`s beauty and I`m standing there looking at it like it was the first time I`d ever seen it.

There`s a very deep draw there and at it`s bottom of it is a ribbon of silver water running it`s length. The banks are very steep, being cut by the waters that feed the forest and the rest of the water just flows away. It`s lush and full of ferns, but few other small plants can find root there, the big trees don`t let enough light filter down for other plants to grow. It smells of dead leaves and fast water, of times long in the shade with no light to dry it out. It`s a good earthy smell and it always reminds me of the way things smell after a long needed summer rain.

In the summer the air there is heavy and just hangs on to everything and refuses to let go of it`s hold. In the fall, it`s like a bite of winter, the air there is much cooler because of the water and the shade. Only in the dead of winter does light get down through the branches and find it`s way to the ground. The light is like a stranger there and hides behind the big trees causing shadows to pop out at you, like a black and white painting. Except for the green ferns that await spring, there`s no other colors there to hold your eyes to.

Stark and void of much is how I first saw this place, while out hunting, yet it drew me to it`s beauty even then. Only the leaves on the tops of the trees and limbs ever seem to hold out hope for anything more, as they reach out of the draw. I can`t decide if they want out, or they are trying to keep the world at arms length, from the beauty they help to hide.

Otheres might not find this place as I have and see it for what I have seen in it. I feel for them, that they might not get to share in it`s rare gifts it`s given up to me. That little place there has never asked anything of me, but feeds my mind with it`s wonders. Each time I`m there I walk away seeing something I haddn`t the time before. Maybe the place has grown on me and I look at it different than I did and need it`s gifts even more.

Should you ever stumble up on my little place, there`s something right off you`ll see. It`s everything I ever told you it was, but don`t be surprised if you should catch a glimps of me. That place has real beauty, a true work of Nature`s art. I can tare myself away from there, but it still holds my heart.”

“Whenever I thought about it, men and their desires and their deeds seemed like ashen, motionless figures; but in the holy solitude surrounding me everything was light and color, and a fresh breath of life and love caressed me and whispered and stirred the leaves in the luxuriant grove. I watched and enjoyed everything simultaneously, the virile green, the white blossoms, and the golden fruit. And thus in my mind's eye I also saw my one eternally beloved in many forms, now as a lovely child, now as a woman in the full bloom and vigor of love and womanhood, and then as a mother with the unsmiling boy-child in her arms.

I was breathing spring. I clearly saw eternal youth around me, and smilingly I said, "Although this world may not be the best or the most useful, I am convinced it is the most beautiful." Nothing could have troubled me in the grip of this feeling or thought, neither ultimate despair nor selfish fear. For I believed I was looking deep into the veiled heart of nature. I perceived that everything lives eternally and that death furthermore is good-humored and only an illusion. Actually I didn't give it a great deal of thought, not really being in the mood to dissect and analyze the concepts. But I did lose myself happily and deeply in the intertwining and tangling mixtures of joy and pain which are the source of the spice of life, the flowering of awareness, and intellectual pleasure as well as carnal bliss.

A delicate fire was flowing through my veins. What I dreamed of was not only, say, a kiss, nor of arms embracing me; it was not only the need to break off the tormenting thorn of desire and cool the sweet glow through submission; I was longing not just for your lips nor your eyes nor your body. It was rather a romantic mixture of all these things, a remarkable mixture of all sorts of memories and longing. All the mysteries of masculine and feminine wantonness seemed to be swirling around me when suddenly your face excited me, in my solitude, to a fever-pitch. Playful mind and pleasured body now began their alternation and were the common pulse of our united life: we embraced with as much frolic as religion. I pleaded with you, "Yield to the fire again," and I implored, "Be insatiable." And all the while I was eavesdropping with cool objectivity on every gentle tug and twitch of joy so that not one might escape me and thus leave a gap in the perfect harmony. I did not merely enjoy; I felt and encompassed the joy.”

“Wow, I loved that, who ever you are! I wish I could write like that some day. And here I only thought you knew one word.

I`m sorry for that!”

“I grew up in the country and as much as I could I stayed in the woods out behind our place. I loved to camp on the banks of the Blue Bayou, it`s waters were clear, fast and very deep in some places. It`s there I learned to swim, fish, explore and do the things most boys only dream about doing.

One of the best places to swim on the bayou was up behind our place and the boys from around there used to meet up and camp out as much as we could steal away.

This one time we all got together and decided we wouldn`t bring much in the way of stuff to eat. We`d just catch fish and hunt some rabbits for food. We all decided we`d just live off the land and back then you could too. We all knew that place like the back of our hands and the best spots to fish and hunt.

Back then we didn`t have a lot of tackel, a few fish hooks and sinkers and we were good to go. There`s always grubs under cow patties and old rotted logs and earth worms can be found there too after a rain. Crickets and grasshoppers were like flies in the long grass and free for the taking.

To get a rabbit all you need is a good long limber stick, with a tiny v at the very end of it. The way we rabbit hunt is to take that stick and run it down every hole we see and see if it comes back out a bit. If it does you got a rabbit in that hole and you have to run the stick back in there and twist it real fast, keeping a bit of pressure on the stick at the same time. The stick will get harder to twist and it`s because the stick has caught in the rabbits fur. Then all there is left to do is pull it out and you got a rabbit for supper.

Well, it didn`t take long to get real sick of rabbits, pearch, bluegills, sun-pearch and the odd bass, till we were after the big old catfish there are in the bayou.

Where I`m from they call it hoggin`, when you get in the water and run your arm up in the holes of the banks and in old hollow logs feeling for catfish. If you feel one you try to get your hand in the catfish`s mouth and run your fingers out it`s gills and gang on thight. The big ones will roll over and over and leave red marks around your arm, trying to break free. If you feel a small catfish, you just grab it the best you can and flip it out of the water and up on the banks before it can slip out of your hands. Someone is always on the banks to catch `em and we take turns hoggin`.

Well, we were going along like this real good and getting a few nice ones so we didn`t bother with any small ones. It came my turn and I got off in the water and started working my way up the bank feeling every hole as I came to them. I`d feel around for the holes with my feet in places if the water wasn`t over my head, but in the real deep water I`d have to go under and run my arm along the banks looking and feeling for holes. I found this hole and ran my hand in it and felt something slick move away from my hand. I lunged my hand deep in there and caught hold of it, but knew I didn`t want it as soon as I`d gotten a hold on it good. I had a snake in my hands and couldn`t turn lose of it, or it`d bite me. I didn`t know where I had a hold of it for sure, if it was at the front of the snake or at the middle. I just knew I didn`t have it`s head because it was trying to get at me and it coiled around my arm. Well, it seemed like I held on to it forever trying to decide what to do with it and then I started running out of air. I had to do something and as soon as it cleared the hole it`d have room to get at me. If I just let go of it, it would bite me as I drew my hand away or come out and bite me before I got out of the water. I braced my feet against the bottom of the river bed and lunged up out of the water as fast as I could, slinging that snake and screaming snake at the same time, I let `er go.

It`s like it was yesterday, I can see that big old cotton mouth going out across there like it was a piece of water hose cutting the air as it twirled around and around and landed smack in the middle of the boys all standing on the bank. It went smack around my little brother`s neck and everyone up ther came undone. My little brother flung it off him faster than a cat can lick itself, but he wasn`t being picky which way he flung it either. It caught one of the boys fleeing almost around the waist and he gave it a fling and it almost hit another boy, but missed.

I sat there in the water and laughed till I thought I`d die. That was one of the funniest things I`d ever seen before in my life. Well, I laughed to long, or hard, I`m not sure which, but all of a sudden those boys were all in the river trying to kill me. And they would have too, but I quit laughing and hauled out of there like a house afire. I burned it up all the way back to the house and never looked back.

Heck, I`d laughed at them boys before and they didn`t take to it all that good.

To this day, they all think that I was trying to throw that snake on them. I try not to bring it up anymore, I don`t run a fast as I used to.”

“heh heh heh. he said snake.”

“lol

Please continue!”

“I was born in Kansas, them moved to Colorado and from there to Arkansas. Well, maybe that has something to do with me and why I am the way I am. The first two places I lived, I was very small and things were mighty big. There you had to have a real reach on you to touch anything in those two places. I guess I brought that feeling along with me to Arkansas, when we packed up and moved here.

We moved to Arkansas and I was like a kid in a candy store, I had to get my hands on every thing I saw. For the first time in my young life things were within reach of a small boy with big ideas. You can`t see all that far anywhere around you in Arkansas and not see trees. For the first time, no matter where I looked, if I saw something I could walk there and touch it at least in about an hour.

I was into everything and always after something too. It wasn`t that I was a bad little boy as much as I just had a lot of ground to cover and boy stuff I needed to be doing. Tearing off like I did after things, it didn`t take long till other little boys would see me doing it and they`d tear right off in there after me. It`s just what little boys the world over do, we can tell the way another boy is walking he`s headed after some fun.

I`d get off into a bog, or creek after a snake or frog and have the time of my life doing it too, what little boy doesn`t love that? It got to where folks went to calling me wild Bill all the time and never just said Hi there Bill, it was hey wild Bill, what are you up to, or after today?

For the first time in my life my size had nothing to do with my fun and other older boys got to chasing after me and getting into the things I`d dream up. Size didn`t have anything to do with rank and I was always leading us off into more trouble. I could think up more stuff to get into than we could ever get around to doing.

Now it got to where folks went to saying here comes wild Bill and the outlaws every where we`d show up. We were living large and got to taking chances more and more, just to see if we could do it and not get caught.

We young boys ran down and caught us a horse that belonged to one of the boy`s distant family. Try as we might we couldn`t ride that sucker a lick till he`d pile us up like so much tossed hay. We/I decided if we couldn`t ride the crazy thing we might as well let him pull us in and old wooden wagon we`d found out back in a draw. We couldn`t find any tack to work him to, but we didn`t let that stop us. We just cut up a bunch of ropes we found and made do with them, tying that horse off to the tongue of the wagon any places we thought ought to have a rope on it.

It took some doing but we got him tied off in that thing and everyone piled off up in that wagon and got ready for a little ride. One little boy that didn`t want to ride with us held the horse till we all got in. (You know, that little boy later made a doctor, he was smart even way back then.) I yelled at him to cut `er lose and let `er rip, those words still haunt me to this day and I`ll off load if I hear them come out of anyone, but I was young then and full of life and never thought anything could happen to me.

We were off like a shot out of a cannon, right off we knew we`d forgot something, no one had made any way for us to stop him or turn him. We didn`t think he`d go very far, or fast and just thought he`d stop in a bit when he got tired. NO,.... That sucker lined out of there and lit a shuck going cross country, or at least out of the one he was in. Well, flat ground is a rare thing were I grew up and we weren`t finding any either. We had a wild ride going and the faster that horse went the higher that wagon and us went to bouncing. We lost the first two boys that way and the rest of us went to trying to hang on for dear life after seeing them flip off out of there and tumble around like they did. I wish now I`d fell out the way they did, they were the lucky ones and we just didn`t know it. We didn`t know we had a run away horse on our hands, we just though he`d slow in a bit and we`d all bail on the ride. We were coming to a fence and we thought he`d stop when he got close to it or at least turn, but he didn`t. That horse went through that fence like a knife through hot butter and drug us right along behind him. Well, the bobwire caught on one of the back wheels and we thought that`d slow him down and it did some, but not for long. The wire just went to flying away from the posts all down that line of fence. Now if any of us had been brave enough to have jumped, we`d be cut to shreads with the wire cutting across us. We didn`t have long to worry over that because, right ahead of us was a grove of trees and we were in `em faster than I can tell you about it. I don`t know how we made it as far back in there as we did till, that blame horse went through a place in between two trees that he just made it through. Well, that wagon flew apart on us like a bunch of dry fire wood, it must have been rotten pretty bad the way it went to kindlin` the way it did. We didn`t fair much better than the wagon and it busted us all up pretty bad too. I got a broken collar bone out of it, another boy broke an arm and another a leg and a lot of stitches for all of us and we were back at it in no time at all.

Now I`d like to tell you we learned a lot from that and never did anything like that again, but it took two more old wagons before we gave up that bad practice. Well, the real reason we gave it up was old wagons like that were hard to come by after that. We didn`t know where any more were.

Oh, and the horse, didn`t have a scratch on him and was none the worse for the wear. We didn`t know he was wild until after we`d played with him.

It`s taken me a long time to understand things, but I`ve learned that I can`t reach out and grab everything I see. There`s things I`ll never be able to touch, or reach, but they can still touch me.

It`s a wonder kids ever get to grow up! I hope I never do!”

“I tend to do some wild and crazy things at times, but you`ve come to expect that of me by now.

I worked with a bunch of Indians doing steel work and they pretty much stayed to themselves. But in no time at all they adopted me into their group and we became good and fast friends. I got them into more after hours trouble than they knew what to do with and we got to getting into things on the job as well. We lived mighty large and got to hunting and fishing and riding horses together after work and any time we could get off, we even got to camp out some together too.

Well, I had one of `em call me one day and ask me if I`d be intrested in buying a mule his dad had for sell. You know me, SURE..... seight unseen I buy this mule on the phone and they`ll even bring it to me. I didn`t know if it was a big mule or a little one and it wasn`t long after we got off the phone I sure wish I`d asked him.

They show up with this beautiful jenny buckskin mule in the trailer and unload her. She isn`t as big as I`d liked her to be, but she had good size to her and she was only four years old. I asked why his dad wanted to sell her and he told me because she plowed to fast for him. His dad was getting older and needed a slower older mule to work and not one that would work him so much. I paid him for the mule and he wouldn`t take anything for his trouble getting her to me, he said it was no trouble at all. I should have seen the red flag fly up then and there, but I didn`t and as they drove away I swear I could hear them laughing their butts off. I couldn`t figure out why, but thought they must have shared something I`d done to one or the other of them and was just laughing about that. I was always doing something to one or the other of them and they`d try mighty hard to get me back, but I`d catch `em at it and head it off most times before they could pull it off good.

I couldn`t wait to try her out so I went and got the saddle and got her all hooked up and ready for a ride. She was great and did everything you could ask of a mule, I even tied her off to a log I knew she couldn`t budge just to see her hook up on it and see what she`d do with it. She set in against it and fell to her knees and didn`t back out of it and just pulled her heart out, as I was about to pull up on her she slid the log and I about fell out, I never expected that and would have bet a much bigger mule couldn`t budge it either. Boy, I wouldn`t take a pretty for her right then and I thought I`d got the better of them and I couldn`t help but laugh out loud.

She`d ride good and hook up too, I couldn`t believe my luck and life was good. Well, the boys were getting older and the oldest had just started driving. I didn`t think they ever care about that mule, but they took to her and wanted to ride her all the time and did. My baby girl even got in on the fun and her and her girl pal had a blast riding her too. The boys got to hauling her around in the back of the truck with them like she was a dog. Everyone laughed at the boys and thought that was the funniest thing seeing that mule riding in the back of that truck hanging her head over the side and enjoying the ride. That mule was worse than any dog if you tried to touch that old truck of his. she`d lay your arm open to the bone and pick you up and shake you like a rag. She`d scream and bray at the same time she was doing it too, she decided that old truck was hers and didn`t let anyone she didn`t know touch it. She was full of surprises and all of a sudden she started showing `em to us.

One day for no reason she just came undone on the boys while they were riding her and nothing they could do would change her mind about it. I got ahold of her when they told me about it and sure enough, she did for me what she`d done for them. I haven`t ridden many bucking horses that could do much better of a job of showing you stars. Well, I got her rode down after a few tries and some sore spots on me. I thought I`d got the best of her, but every now and again she`d do stuff like that again and then got to running off on the boys and me. She could hide in stuff you couldn`t hide a rabbit in and get behind a tree and stay put like a cartoon charter does and you`d walk right past her. If you did see her she`d light out like a shuck and the race was on. Well, she`d got away from the boys one day and I was off working, when I got home there were cops going up and down the streets every where. I asked my wife what the deal was when I got into the house and she told me the mule was jumping backyard fences like they weren`t there and taking down clothes lines and stuff in her path. More than that, it was the second time she`d done it while I was away. Everyone around was chasing that silly mule and couldn`t catch her to save their lives. I joined the fun and got caught up to her after about thirty minutes of chasing her crazy hide. She could sail over fences like a deer, that was sure something to see too. She saw me and knew she`d messed up and slid down to wheel about but she wasn`t fast enough and I got an arm around her neck. She hauled in over two back yard chain link fences before she gave up and decided I wasn`t going to let her go.

I knew I had to do something with her, this was getting out of hand, but the cops loved it and so did most of the neighbors and they didn`t want to see me get rid of her. My wife had had it and the mule was going to be locked up with a log chain till I got rid of her.

The very next day I was working for a man I had done a lot of work for in the past and I got to noticing he had an old mule out behind his place. That got us to talking about mules and I went to telling him about mine and was just fixing to tell him all the bad things she`d been doing, when he stopped me and said you wouldn`t concider selling her would you.

I don`t know how I kept from grinning when I told him I didn`t know if I could part with her or not. Oh, that got him in a feaver and now he had to try to have her and deal me out of her at any price. We cut our deal and I told him I`d bring her the next day when I`d be back to finish the job we`d started that day.

He smiled so big at me when he saw me drive up there with that mule in the back of the truck and her acting for all the world like a big old dog. He even liked the fact she almost took his arm off when he went to get her out of the back of there too, but I`d told him before hand she`d do that so, he was ready for it and didn`t lose an arm. All day long he messed with that mule and even got his son over and they played with her as I kept right on working. I got done with work and finished cleaning up to get ready to go and I lost heart in the deal and told him what I`d paid for her and he could have her for that if he still wanted her, he did. I tried to tell him about her other bad habits after he paid me for her, but the words wouldn`t come out. He thanked me about five times as I was pulling out of his drive.

I couldn`t help it, I bust out laughing like those two Indians did on me as they pulled away that day.

I wonder if he heard me and what he might have thought?”

“I have had some adventures in my life, but this is the one, that I never wanted to take and sure never dreamed I`d share it with you.

I`ve shared some of my most sceret things with you here, (my thoughts, special places and things, my fears, my hopes, my pain, my joy and now my loss) but this one I didn`t want to have to tell you about. You already know more about me than any other person that posts here, but you just know bits and tiny pieces of my life.

I woke up Monday evening to find the house dark and quiet and it was past time for my wife to be home from work. I looked at the clock that hangs over the computer and it was half past five. My wife hasn`t been feeling well and she sometimes comes in and takes a nap after work so, I went into the bedroom to check on her, but she wasn`t there. When I came back into the living room I saw a note on the computer and thought she must have come in and had to go do some shopping, or run up to the Church to practice her music.

I read the note and it started off, I`ve chosen this way to do this in order to keep from causing a scene. I don`t know where I`ll be staying tonight, but it doesn`t matter. We need some time apart......

I can`t believe I didn`t fall down dead right then and there, but instead, I got outside of the house as fast as I could. I couldn`t catch my breath and the walls of the house were sucking the life out of me. Oh, the world just kept right on spinning, but I got thrown off of it and my world came undone.
I couldn`t think, or even see right then, I was to busy just trying to catch my breath and wake up from this nightmare I was trapped in.

Twice now, I was let down, my wife was gone and I didn`t die like I expected to. I was going to have to find a way to live with this and one more time endure pain I`d never dreamd a person could have visit them while awake.

I went and looked for her, but didn`t find her at any of the places I could think to look. I didn`t want to tell anyone about it, thinking she`d call in a bit and tell me something, or she`d just come back home, (she didn`t). I broke down while telling my mother and again when I told one sister, I just couldn`t go through that again and tell my kids, brothers and other sisters.

I just wanted to cry myself to death and not have to face anyone else ever again, I just couldn`t do it. Well, I cried myself out, or I thought I had and the pain I had been feeling kindda quit and I started getting numb. I don`t know if I just didn`t want to feel, or I just didn`t have anything left in me to do it with. I was still afraid, hurt and all alone, but it wasn`t killing me like it`d been doing and I caught my breath enough to smoke. My hands were trembling and shaking like an aspen leaf in the fall and I droped everything I tried to hold on to. Again with the water works and another dash out of the house to excape the crush and weight of it all.

I had to collect myself and talk to someone, but I couldn`t talk and I knew it, not and have sound come out I couldn`t. I went into the house and fired up old "Burtha" and went back outside waiting for it to heat up enough to get connected. I reached out on ICQ and was touched by the kinds words that flowed back to me, all the support and understanding I was in so much need of, but no warm arms to be rocked by. Sweet words promised me the sun would come up again in the morning, but I had to ask, are you sure?

I did make it through the night and the sun did come up, I know, I stayed up to make sure it would, just like I was promised it`d do. I went in and made a pot of coffee, the first thing I`d had in me in over a day, but now my hands weren`t shaking and it felt so good just to hold something warm.

I think that`s when I drew the first breath I didn`t have to gasp for.

I didn`t know how I was going to tell you this and I`m not sure what I`ve even said to you, I`ll have to go back and read this in a bit to see. I don`t yet know what`s going to happen, though I have spoke to her she isn`t telling me anything and I`m afraid to ask her.

The computer is hers, even though it`s got a lot of me in it and I can`t take it back any more than I can my love for her. I just don`t know how to.

So, if I should go away, you`ll know why now. I won`t have anyway to get back on and talk to you, I live in a very small town and they don`t have things like that much for everyone to use as of yet.

If the worst does happen, then more bad stuff will follow that and I`m sure going to miss you all.

It`s been fun, Thanks for that!

P.S. Remember, my son in the Army reads these threads so, don`t say anything to hurt him. He is a great young man and is trying very hard not to take sides in this. Please, don`t you say anything to force him to.

I still have hope and things could still work out too!”

“BF good luck in all you do and do not stop being who YOU are. Yo bear”

“Yo Bear!
Thanks and Thanks again for not saying any more than you did!”

“Good Luck with it and do hang in there no matter what.
Some TT'er whom I respect posted something based on one of Nietzsche's famous aphorisms:
"what does not kill me makes me stronger."
I'm damn glad it didn't kill ya, and the stronger part will come... but it will take time.
Reading your stories makes it clear... you have acquired character through the many things you have endured.”

“ASlso Big:. Having my marriage go after living together for 17 years was a bit like a death for me. But with this kind of death, rebirth can follow.

I hope your marriage will survive, but if you need to survive your marriage and a break up, you can survive them. Just so you know.

As an aside, have you ever considered couple's counseling. Its never too late.”

“Bigfoot, I feel for you, buddy. Please hang in there. I know words like these seem like nothing at a time like this, but it's all I can offer. And believe me, there's a lot of folks on the site that care about you.”

“Yer welcome, and Life is short!”

“I think all of you know me well enough to know I`d do anything in the world to keep us together. I have offerd and may have to do it on my own, she won`t go, she says I`m the one that needs help because I can`t turn my back on 29 years of being married to her and being in love with her for seven years before that. She is my world and the air I breathe!

Ped,.... Thank you so much for trying to help me!

I know it`s not fair of me to ask you not to express your feelings, but right now, less is more.

It`s not always what is said as much as it is what you don`t say that makes all the differance in the world!

If I can get my life back together, this will be a scar, to always remind her and others of the cut and pain it caused and I just don`t want it to get so big she can`t stand to see it and not look at me real bad.”

“Kleetn, you`re the very first one to ever have a come back to the first post I ever did on here and I`ve never forgot it, or what I told you, it still holds true!

The very next one was Rad-A-Dude and I haven`t forgot that either.

I`m still out of my mind with fear every time I post and wonder what it`ll get started, or how it`ll be taken. I can`t shake that. But it thrills me to no end to see a name come up and know you read it, that still gets to me.

I wrote a poem on Tarpy`s thread the other day and he came back with one word and it meant so much to me. It was just the one word it was,..(nice)! Well, all of you know me and the Wild one don`t get along and to have that come back to me was great. Like I said, it`s the little things that mean the most and sometimes, less is more. If I just see your trail name come up, I know you read it and understand things, if not me.

Heck, I don`t understand myself!

Thanks ALL!

Thank you Kleetn, (so far I still like you best)!”

“Hey Bigfoot......I wrote ya. Sorry guy. Yeah, you can count on us morons to be supportive when called for. :-)

(Even if you do like kleetn best....sniff, sniff... lol!!)”