Fur Sales & Viagra - A WSJ perspective

“OK, people... listen up...

This comes to you from today's Wall Street Journal. Interestingly, it made the Front page.

Headline: "As Fur Sales Dwindle. A Seal Hunter Clings To His Perilous Trade *** Animal Rights Protests Hurt The Market For Pelts; Curiously, So Does Viagra

Tilting, Newfoundland - "Every Year about this time, Michael O'Keefe and thousands of other Canadian fishermen head out into the icy Atlantic to hunt seals - a dangerous job the industry is trying to bring back from decline..."

"... Until last year, the hunters routinely killed about a quarter million seals a year off the east coast of Canada. But last year, the seal harvest plunged to just 90,000 animals. Animal rights activists have hurt the market for seal pelts, whose prices have dropped along with government subsidies for the industry, although there's talk of a moderate rebound in pelt prices this year."

"A recent report prepared for the Canadian government by a panel of marine experts points to another unexpected cause of the decline. In the past, hunters benefitted from a market for seal penises, which some Asians believe to be an aphrodisiac. The report cites "the increased use of Viagra as a substitute for seal penises".

"Sales are 'way down' from a few years ago, says Sang-Jo Chung, who runs an herbal shop in Toronto's Korean district. . Mr. Chung points to a leathery 10-inch seal penis on display in a glass case, which he says has been sitting unsold for more than four months."

"A few years ago, Mr. Chung says he would sell 20 or so seal penises a year, and he has had to lower the price to about $70 from more than $103. "I think it's Viagra," he says, explaining the slumping sales. People can just go see a doctor and pop a pill, whereas slices of seal penis are often boiled, which can be smelly, and is added to soup or wine. Although the same penis can be used several times, only older folks are interested in the products, he says..."

"...The vast majority of of the seals killed in the annual hunt are young ones with penises too small to be worth much... To improve its fortunes, the seal industry is furiously promoting new products, from seal pepperoni to seal pizza. But profits from the hunt have fallen so much that hundreds of fishermen have given it up."

There's more, but you get the idea.

Anyone for seal jerky?”

“I have heard that Panda Coats are really warm.”

“my kitten trenchcoat is boss!”

“LOL Trailbuddy!

Radagast, Do you know of Leisure Suit Larry, king of the lounge lizards? It *suits* you well! LOL :o)”

“Ooops! That's Leisure Suit Larry in the Land of the Lounge Lizards. You get the idea.”

“I think I'll go pour myself a drink.

I call my drink a 'baby seal' --

Canadian Club over ice with a shot on the side.”

“Gordon, couldn't you pour a Molson fast, then punch the Canadian Club through the head?”

“*(Well, right about that time people
A fur-trapper (who was strictly from commercial)
Had the unmitigated audacity to jump up from behind my igloo (peekaboo) )
And he started into whippin' on my favorite baby seal
With a lead-filled snowshoe)*

I said, with a
Lead-
Filled
With a lead filled snowshoe
He said, "Peekaboo"
I said, with a
Lead-Filled
With a lead filled snowshoe
He said, "Peekaboo"
He went right upside the head of my favorite baby seal
he went "whap" with a lead-filled snowshoe, and
he hit him on the nose and hit him on the fin, and he
that got me just about as evil as an eskimo boy can be. So I bent down and I reached down, and I scooped down and I gathered up a generous mitten-ful of the deadly *YELLOW SNOW*

The deadly yellow snow, from right there where the huskies go!

Whereupon I proceeded to take that mittenful of the deadly yellow snow crystals and rub it all into his beady little eyes with a vigorous circular motion hitherto unknown to the people of this area, but destined to take the place of the mudshark in your mythology.
here it goes,the circular motion, now Rub It!

*(Here Fido)*

And then
In a fit of anger
I pounced

And I pounced again

Great Googly Moogly!

I jumped up and down on the chest of the him

I injured
The fur trapper

Well he was very upset, as you can understand
And rightly so, because the
Deadly yellow snow crystals had
Deprived him of his
Sight

And he stood up, and he looked around, and he said

"I can't see"
"I can't see"
"Oh, woe is me"
"I can't see"

"Well.....you know
I can't see
Nothin'"

fz”