I AM GOD, I AM GOD, I AM GOD, I AM GOD!

“Oh, well, I am not god, he he, anyway, how is everyone, I am hyper. Hey, I met this chick on the internet, who is really cool. I met AmyG on the internet, what do you think of this?”

“give us her email.”

“I think I'm getting tired of meaningless Tarpy threads.”

“You are hyper? Geez, Joy, you must be sick...”

“Har Har Har!

Her number is 1-888-Fukk-Off Beeeeyaaaatch! he he he”

“I have the body of a God. Buddha, that is.”

“Which Buddha, the Tibetan Buddha is a thin man with long hair. The Japanese Buddha is a big fat bald man, and I don't think any strict vegan would be a fatso, so I don't know where that idol came from.”

“This guy could use a 'lude.”

“No, but seriously this chick is cool!”

“It was me, Tarpy. I was only pretending to be fifteen.”

“She is 21!”

“HE is a sixty y/o, balding, beer swilling, cigar toking, wanker living at home with his elderly mom and his collection of porn from the 60s. He probably sent you a picture of himself (herself) face down in a hot spring taken on a recent backpacking trip to Idaho, right?”

“LMAO, flyguy!”

“hahahahha! Tarpy, you crack me up.”

“Now, bacpac...
Don't mention 'ludes here.
Nafook might be lurking and come out of his closet and clout you with his temper!

Tarpie?

How did I guess it was you started this thread?”

“Rorer 714 "lemons"

They just don't make 'em like they use to!”

“Sayeth Tarp Rat:
"I don't think any strict vegan would be a fatso"

I'm vegan, and while I'm not yet fat I do have a good start on a beer belly. Oh yes, beer is very vegan!”

“Does G-d have a sense of humor? Oh you better believe it!

Preacher Dies During Sermon About Heaven
http://apnews.myway.com/article/20050111/D87HKMPO0.html
Jan 10, 10:43 PM (ET)

OVIEDO, Fla. (AP) - A Presbyterian minister collapsed and died in mid-sentence of a sermon after saying "And when I go to heaven ...," his colleague said Monday.

The Rev. Jack Arnold, 69, was nearing the end of his sermon Sunday at Covenant Presbyterian Church in this Orlando suburb when he grabbed the podium before falling to the floor, said the Rev. Michael S. Beates, associate pastor at Covenant Presbyterian.

Before collapsing, Arnold quoted the 18th century Bible scholar, John Wesley, who said, "Until my work on this earth is done, I am immortal. But when my work for Christ is done ... I go to be with Jesus," Beates said in a telephone interview.

Several members of the congregation with medical backgrounds tried to revive the minister and paramedics were called, but Arnold appeared to die instantly, Beates said.

Arnold had been the senior minister at the church until the late 1990s when he began traveling to Africa and the Middle East to teach pastors. The cause of death was believed to be cardiac arrest. He had bypass surgery five years earlier.

Beates also recounted Arnold's death in an e-mail he sent to members of the Central Florida Presbytery.

"We were stunned," Beates said. "It was traumatic, but how wonderful it was he died in his own church among the people he loved the most."”

“"And when I go to heaven ..

Bet that phrase is never uttered again by anyone in that congregation”

“They would if they were believers, wouldn't they?”

“Just because you're a believer doesn't mean you want to speed up the process.”

“This thread has ads for "Free Sermons" LOL!”

“I would think SO, unless they were doubtful believers. I'd wanna be out of here yesterday...get me some of that rapture and bliss.”

“Good thing he didn't say anything about God striking him dead with a giant meteor right where he stands! :)”

“Convert to Islam and blow yourself up in Iraq or Israel. You get the package deal: rapture and bliss, plus a bunch of virgins. Better do it quick though. There is a long line waiting for the payoff, and it's bound to get longer because this is such a good deal.”

“Or "May God strike me dead if I'm wrong..."


I wish I could see the ads.
last edited: 1/14/05 9:43:42 AM”

“Call now! Only 23 more suicide bombings left! You get the rapture, the bliss, and the virgin attachments, all for one low, low payment of your life! A once-in-a-lifetime offer!”

“How about one virgin first as a token of good faith?”

“And, if you pull the pin in the next five minutes, we're double the rapture and bliss, and you get double the number of virgins.

Offer not valid in Nevada and Oregon; local laws and regulations may apply. May not be combined with any other offer.”

“Or a few virgins if I recruit suicide bombers? You know, a commission of sorts.”

“That's funny geobeet, I almost added disclaimers on my post. Ha!”

“Overheard standing in the martyr's line...

"How long must I wait for alla's will to be done!?"”

“I wonder what they say when they find out that God is Jewish.”

“D'oh!”

“I wonder what ALL of them would say if they found out God didn't give a damn about religion.”

“tech - it should be: Oy vey! I was such a mashoogina!”

“Speaking of being godly, Bushie just arrived here in my town for another (yawn) speech. He's snarling traffic all over the place.”

“You get to keep him.”

“Please keep him?”

“I DON"T WANT HIM!”

“Wow. You've had more opportunities to see him then I have.”

“His brother and our beloved little mayor John Peyton were there to welcome him at the airport; Peyton barely comes to Jeb's shoulder, he's so short. You can just see his hair blowing around over the top of the prez's limo.”

“I am suprised he came into JIA; AF1 usually lands at Mayport NS, just up the road from me.”

“I think it's only right that the President parcel out personal appearances in the states that voted for him, places where he feels welcome and nasty demonstrators don't remind him that he taunted the Iraqi insurgents with "Bring 'em on!"”

“Ever notice that he doesn't come here very much? :)”

“You're a lucky b@st@rd, TB.”

“lol. Hell, I didn't see as much as one political commercial here prior to the election for the presidential candidates...”

“It was constant here.”

“We never see him here except during campaign time. We're also the lowest state in terms of federal money returned. Fair trade I think.”

“In response to your logic concerning Islam, for one, the Israelis think that God has granted them the holy land, and it gives them the right to occupy, oppress, etc, and when the oppressed fight back for their land and rights, they are labeled terrorists.

In response to that "crazy Islamic religion", your points try to discount these poeples actions even further. Yet it is the Israelis who are such fanatics that they think they are the chosen few who God has granted the land to. So on one side you have the Israeli religious fanatics, and the other you have people who want their land back and who are fighting by any means possible. Check out some interviews with both sides, the answer from the Israelis is always pointed towards being chosen and of Gods will, and the answer from the Palestinians is always an issue of land and oppression, rarely do you hear of Islam except that it is part of their culture.

I am not saying that either side is correct, just pointing out a flaw in the comments on this page.

In addition, I think the word terrorist is used far too often... anyone who has nothing (i.e. helicopters, nuclear bombs, etc) and who fights back for what they believe in by the only means possible (flying a plane into a building, strapping a bomb to themselves, etc) , and usually leads to them killing themselves in the process, is labeled a terrorist. If someone came to our country and we had no army and were occupied, we would certainly be terrorists; it’s a matter of circumstantial resistance.

Lastly, you can't fight that, no war involving terrorists has ever been won, you can pacify them, but you only bread more hate. For example:

Iraq New Terror Breeding Ground
War Created Haven, CIA Advisers Report
By Dana Priest
Washington Post Staff Writer
Friday, January 14, 2005; Page A01

Iraq has replaced Afghanistan as the training ground for the next generation of "professionalized" terrorists, according to a report released yesterday by the National Intelligence Council, the CIA director's think tank.

Iraq provides terrorists with "a training ground, a recruitment ground, the opportunity for enhancing technical skills," said David B. Low, the national intelligence officer for transnational threats. "There is even, under the best scenario, over time, the likelihood that some of the jihadists who are not killed there will, in a sense, go home, wherever home is, and will therefore disperse to various other countries."

President Bush has frequently described the Iraq war as an integral part of U.S. efforts to combat terrorism. But the council's report suggests the conflict has also helped terrorists by creating a haven for them in the chaos of war.


But as instability in Iraq grew after the toppling of Hussein, and resentment toward the United States intensified in the Muslim world, hundreds of foreign terrorists flooded into Iraq across its unguarded borders. They found tons of unprotected weapons caches that, military officials say, they are now using against U.S. troops. Foreign terrorists are believed to make up a large portion of today's suicide bombers, and U.S. intelligence officials say these foreigners are forming tactical, ever-changing alliances with former Baathist fighters and other insurgents.
last edited: 1/14/05 12:05:27 PM”