Is it important . . .

“Hey guys, I've got a question for you. (Girls should put in their two cents, as well.) If you are on a backpack w/ a women, is it important for her to not be a !$%&? I mean does it really bug a guy if he is bping w/ a girl who is a little uncertain, new to bping, and sometimes a complainer? Should she just shut her mouth if she can't hack it anymore or should she say, "F@#K IT" and let you know that she must stop. I'm new to this and sometimes I just have to rest, but I don't want my bping buds to get annoyed (more so the men, they're usually less understanding) to the point that they don't want to bp w/ me.”

“If I were on a backpack with a women, I would expect her to tell me if it were uncomfortable. We would be able to proceed after we get things rearranged.”

“Yeah, if the girl is slow or annoying, it isn't as fun, except for one condition. If the chick is hot, and wearing tight clothes, I don't care what she does.”

“newgirl, I don't think that telling someone you need to stop is complaining. I would just let the people you are going to hike with know that you need to take a few more breaks than them. As you build yourself up, you will need to take less breaks.

For someone to actually complain all the time would suck.”

“It's not just women. It's anyone. Know your limits. Things get REEAAALLLY slow if someone overexerts or hurts themselves so it's better to take preventative measure and pace things. Once you hike with someone for a while, you get to know their limitations and strengths.”

“hike your own hike, newgirl. If you have to worry so much about what the others think, you won't be having a good time. Besides that, would you want to spend five days backpacking with people who won't let you rest when you want to? What fun is that? Guys can be pretty whiney too ya know.”

“It is quite possible to voice dissatisfaction or displeasure without whining or bitching.”

“Be sure to stop and tend to any "hot spots" (blisters-to-be) right away! A stitch in time, saves nine. Yeah, don't worry about what others think. Worst case scenario, they'll have water boiling for a cup of tea when you get to camp.”

“It's always best if there are a few fasties and a few slowpokes. Having been both on different hikes, I know how frustrating either can be.”

“newgirl,

lipstick hiker is 100% correct.
The person that would annoy me is the one who can?t be sympathetic to someone who isn?t in as good a shape as they are. That is not the type of person you would want to hike with anyway. Just go out there, have fun and walk as fast as you want to and stop when you want to.”

“Great Drinking Bear. Thanks for the advice. My other question then is how do you determine if you and your bping buds are a good match? For instance, I like to take my time, Drinking Bear doesn't like to go too slow, I don't think we'd enjoy a hike together. Have any of you had the experience of hooking up the wrong bping partners, how did you handle the sit.?”

“It's never fun to do anything with someone who's in a bitchy mood. I hate whining and complaining *but* at the same time, if you are tired or are coming up lame and have to stop, make yourself heard!

Try to minimize the complaining...tough it out as much as you can, you'll earn some admiration from the rest of the crew.”

“Hike with people of similar abilities and in similar physical (and emotional) shape. Or hike alone -- you just mught learn something about who you are.”

“My thoughts are a combination of some of the previous posts. First, it doesn't matter if you're male or female, anyone can be a !$%&?. Secondly, I'm not much on whiners but there are less obnoxious ways to let your hiking partners know that you're uncomfortable. Thirdly, it's not much fun for me if someone is really uncomfortable. I love to bring new folks backpacking, but if they're not enjoying themselves, I'd like to know it. I'll temper that thought with the idea that a new backpacker should give themselves some time before complaining unless they're in real pain. It usually takes me a couple of days before I get acclimated to the backwoods and lower my comfort level from cushy city life.

It doesn't matter to me if someone doesn't match my hiking pace. I prefer a moderately slow pace (2mph) but can speed up or slow down as the situation demands. You can always come to an understanding about meeting up down the trail if your speeds are incompatable. That gives you the pleasure of experiencing the woods as a solo backpacker, with the comfort (and safety)of having a partner.”

“Be sure to let your partners know before the hike what your pace/condition is. Tell them that you will need extra breaks and then take them. You don't have to stay within 2 feet of each other on a hike, do your own thing. If you aren't comfortable with finding you way or being alone on the trail, think about investing in a pair of 2 way radios. My regular bping partner is faster than I, and would not leave me alone on the trail causing some problems...I was either trying to keep up with him or he was trying to stay back with me. We were both miserable and the radios worked like a charm! We each hike our own pace now and as an extra bonus, we get to spend some time alone on the trail with our thoughts. Please don't whine though, just do what you can, do a little more, then take a break!”

“I'd rather know if my partner(s) need a break; that's not being a b**ch. Even if it's frequent.
Constant complaining is another thing.

In answer to your second question, hiking often becomes solitary anyway, so if one person drops back for a while, so be it. Enjoy the hike as you will.”

“Okay, third question . . . how do you meet nice men/boys to bp w/. I mean in the romantic sense. I have seen people on other threads posting stuff about groups, clubs, etc. There isn't any of that around my neck of the woods (which is a pretty rednecky neck of the woods) to my knowledge.”

“Where to meet people that hike/climb/ski/go-to-church? -- obsiously wherever people do said activity. I meet about 2-3 new climbers every week either at the crags or in the bars.”

“Hmmmm, I guess that would work. Oh, who cares. I don't want to meet any nice backpacking men anyway. I am sooooo tired right now. I am sick to death of my booooring job. I'm destroying my own thread topic.”

“newgirl, you don't even get close to destroying this thread.
You need one of the professionnal thread degenerators.
Where's Rad? Where's Kleetn?”

“Hike your own hike.
Post your own post.
Apologize for nothing (even if you are wrong)
Do alittle dance, make a little...

You get the point!
Its almost here! It IS here! Goodnight Gracie...”

“How about Tarpie-The-Tarprific-Rat? He always has something twisted and totally off to add!”

“You really ARE new, aren't you?
Do NOT petition the Rat with prayer.
You CANNOT petition the Rat with prayer!!!!”

“Good reference Dunadan.

East Coast time. He's headed off in the Flintmobile already.”

“That Rat done high-tailed it.”

“Where are you guys at? West Coasters? I'm on Mountain Time, one more hr. of hell to endure. Sorry, that I petitioned the Rat. I'm tired and I had a moment of weakness.”

“East Coast. I'm outa here as soon as this dang thing finishes printing.”

“Did someone say it mountin' time?
YEEEE HAWWWWW!”

“Here is how I see it. A good backpacking partner is hard to find. I am willing to accomodate newbies just to get them into the sport. I don't want their first experience to be so bad that they give up. If I know someone is new we just plan an easy hike. We have already determined that backpacking is not a sport so being competitive is poor form.

Drinking Bear was 100% correct on the Babe factor though.”

“Newgirl
You need to try to hit a few trips that the Western TTers have. Meet people and learn all you can about gear, places to go, ect.
Once you've gained some knowledge, Do some solo trips and build up your speed and stamina. Pretty soon you'll be hard core enough to hang with anybody.”

“Walkindude, I'm not sure I want to be hardcore. I want to hang out w/ my inexper. and exper. buddies, but I just want to keep it simple. My prob. is that some people (as bacpac mentioned) get competitive and turn the hike into training camp. Are there rules? Can I just do things how I want?”

“Newgirl, learn how to just let things happen as they will. I have never been on a group hike where everyone stayed within 2 hours of each other, much less had a race!!

On the other question, I met my sweetheart on a forum planned hike on top of a mountain in MO!! We still enjoy the mountains together and plan to for a very long time. Met the last boyfriend on a forum hike also. They're out there...which is where you'll have to be to find them. LOL”

“I've been hiking for a couple of years, but this year is the first time for backpacking. I started training 3 nights at cardio and 2 nights weight training. I truely feel that the cardio was most important for me. It only took 2 - 3 weeks and I could feel the difference. The guys I hike and BP with are very understanding and patience. If they weren't I'd find new partners. They also understand that I stop to take pictures. Sometimes they go ahead, but I catch up with them. I'm in AZ and it gets very very hot here so I have to stop for breaks more often. Best of luck with your partners - I'm sure they will understand.”

“If it's something serious then complain, but don't camplaing about bugs, sun, heat, bad tasting water, bad tasting food, ect.”

“A lot of experienced backpackers forgot what it was like for them on their first trips. I remember being in absolute agony, stopping every 50 yards to rest. (My equipment was really really bad.) I came very close to turning back the first day. If I'd done that, I probably would never have tried again. Fortunately, I was alone, so no one was along to complain that I was too slow. I just kept going, until my body got used to the weight of the pack. By the third day, it started being fun. Being in good shape helps, but carrying a full pack uses totally different muscles. I could dayhike 17 miles before my first backpacking trip -- and I barely was able to backpack six miles the first few times I went out. I've taken beginners out a few times, and generally plan for a very slow and easy pace, with lots of breaks. And I MAKE them keep their loads light. I backpack with others to share my love of the lifestyle with people I like. If they don't enjoy the experience, if it becomes a death march, they won't go back, and as a leader and a friend, I've failed abysmally. Complaining about a forced pace has nothing to do with whether or not you are a whiner - sometimes it's just a matter of degree, or of how tired you are. I've heard a lot of experienced backpackers get mighty short tempered at the end of a hard day. And I've heard a fair number of complaints about things like all day rains or bad blowdowns or bad bugs. As long as they realize that it doesn't do any good or change anythign to complain about it, and if they don't expect me to magically fix things, I don't mind if it's not incessant.

As to finding people to go with - you might be surprised at the groups in your area. Check out the environmental organizations (Sierra club etc.) and universities. They often have outings groups. See if anyone does trail maintenance in your area. Those volunteers often backpack as well, and they're terrific people. Sometimes a local group offers classes in backpacking - go to the nearest outdoor store and see if they know any such groups. If all else fails - go alone or with one other person on short jaunts where you can take your time without the pressure of your more experienced buddies.”

“As someone else said hike your own hike. I hike with a several hiking clubs and friends etc. Each of us hike our own hike and get there when we get there. Nothing wrong with hiking alone just make sure everyone knows where you are stopping or the just look for the ones in front.
I like it when I get on the hike alone gives you time to think and enjoy the moment.”

“here's a rule for you, toots:

quit your bitchin' and get me a beer, dammit.

if i'm a little to fast for you, tell me to slow down. if i get pissed, tell me to shove it up my ass.

oh, and have fun or get bent.”

“When in doubt see rule number one.”

“yes!”

“Radagast, Bacpac . . . you two are really, truly great men (I'm pretty sure you're men, anyway). Thanks for the great advice.”

“I'm game for a couple of trips a year with slow folks or newbies. I also like trips where I can stride out and cover some ground.

The boyfriend and I go at our own pace--sometimes he is first and sometimes I am. We say the guy in back is the one that lost the trail last. He is usually faster than I am so he goes a ways and waits for me or he lets me get way ahead and then catches up.

I remember one time years ago when the boys would not stop. After another hour and several tries I just sat down in the trail and cried. They stopped.”

“I don't really feel that I need to cry, just that I want to complain a bit.”

“My husband & hike at close to the same pace. When we hike in places where there are bears or cougars, we make a point of hiking close to each other.”

“Here are a couple other ideas that no-one has mentioned (I don't think)
1) Go through the newbies gear to ensure that they are not carrying excess weight.
2) if a newbie starts to slow down - offer to transfer some of their stuff to your pack. I don't like carrying other peoples sh:t - but atleast it will keep them moving at a steady pace - and they won't be so beat the next day. They'll be stronger next trip”

“To be honest, if it wasn't for my wife telling me to stop and take a break, I would be lying on the side of the trail dehydrated and near death. Although we tend to hike at a slightly different rate, she keeps me from pushing myself to fast too soon. I tend to forget that the water in my pack is for drinking and not just for carrying. I like the fact that she is there to remind me that I am no longer 21 years old.

Hike at your own pace. The mountain or the campsite will still be there when you arrive. If your friends don't like your pace, tell them to get a life and just enjoy the fact that you are in the woods and not sitting at home watching TV. If all else fails, get new friends who are not a**holes.”