Your questions answered!

“Bacpac, I want to thank you for having the courage to come forward with your problem. I am sorry I cannot reach you via the email address you gave me (littleweenie@lonely.com) so I will attempt to answer your questions in this open forum.

While most men's sexual problems are psychological in nature if you're under 60, older men may actually have physiological problems. Bacpac, your problem is known as erectile dysfunction (e.g. the Wet Noodle syndrome: can't get it up or it won't stay up). There is another category where the erection is there but climaxing is slow or difficult. If it?s difficult for you, imagine how it must be for your unfortunate partner, though your usual partner e.g. your hand, probably doesn?t mind.

It?s also possible you have had an embarrassing or humiliating experience involving your pen!s. You may be helped by one of the exercises regarding this problem that I have on my website. Basically, if you can remember a failure that was embarrassing or the many times you were made fun of by boys with normal-sized johnsons, you have to be disconnected emotionally from that experience.

Now go do the right thing.
1-800-DRLAURA”

“Question for you Dr. Laura - What do you think of people that call themselves doctor, when they actually do not have a doctorate in medicine? And why are you such a cum dumpster?”

“Doctor Laura, thank you for your expert opinion. Regretfully you have understated my problem.

I have no pen!s.”

“HAHAHA LMAO!!”

“You do not got no goober?!
Mebbe you had a reptile disfunction. That is what happened when a frend of my daddy got hit goober bit off by a gater.”

“Well, she is sort of a snake.”

“ROTFLMAO!!
I hate to be laughted at. Don't you bacpac? LOL”

“Me too.”

“Au Contrare Leatherneck. I will do anything for attention good or bad. Pee in my cornflakes, stab me in the back, steal my weiner. It is all good.

If we can't laugh at ourselves how can we laugh at all the other pathetic loosers?”

“Ditto bacpac, how true!”

“Dr. Laura, yer losin yer edge. You used to do a better job of picking targets and choosing yer attacks.
Lousy diagnosis too!
"Koro" is more like it.

Dick Nixin of Maxim's take

Official Scorekeeper: Award BacPac points for honesty. Ain't no hypocrisy in how he responded to this thread.
You can take the points from Dr. Laura.”

“Interesting link Ped. How do you find this stuff?

Why?”

“BP, I learned about Koro in graduate school (clinical psychology). So I searched "koro" on google and tried to pick links that were entertaining and had it right (a bunch of them said it was a Japanese thing, which it isn't).

And I had to drop the link that had "pen!s" in the html coz it wouldn't get through Matt's auto-censor.”

“Is this the same thing as that link with the ornamental guys pulling a tractor with their weenies?”

“Huh?”