My Boss . . .

“Is worthless, ignorant, has no clue how to multi-task or manage people, is a gossip queen, is lazy, makes more money than me, needs a personal trainer and some conditioner for her brillo pad like hair, and will probably be firing me for being insubordinate sometime next week if I tell her to her face just how pathetic I think she really is.

Why am I writing this here? You see, my boss is a fat, lazy, slob who can barely walk down the hall to the cafeteria at more than a mere snail?s pace. I have no fear of her taking a liking to backpacking, climbing or hiking or searching the internet for information of that nature; so, I am safe to vent here without reprise from that foot fungused, brain dead, master degree bearing mutant from hell.

I'm not going to post what has placed me at this state of mind in an effort to NOT pull a newgirl. So. . .let's just turn this thread into a thread about why our bosses suck!!

Gosh, I almost feel better.

See you at the meditation thread!!!”

“*smiling*.. knowing exactly how you feel.. as do all of us who have ever had the chance to word for some worthless manager whom we trained, and still doesn't fathom the depth of the tasks they ask us to complete, ontime, every day.”

“My manager is a treasure troll!”

“My boss sucks because he got mad when I hung a banana out of my fly and ran around the office yelling "Look at me! Look at me!"”

“I had a big fat piece of sh!t boss once. It sucked, I feel for ya. If you want to get her fired, buy a box of twinkies, place them on the floor leading to a lockable closet. In the closet, place a big peice of chocolate cake and several animal porn magazines. be sure to photocopy her boss' face and cut and paste over the animal's faces on the magazine covers. When she follows the trail to the closet, and goes for the cake, slam the door behind her and lock it. Then turn off the lights in the closet, nonchalantly find her boss, and lead him past the closet door. When he hears the pounding, and opens it, turn on the lights, and you'll be the new manager.”

“Buddha,

I'm working on that as we speak!!! That's great!”

“maybe she can just borrow some of your animal porn mags BB.”

“No thanks. I have my own. . .”

“LMAO mountainchick!”

“Or you could log into several deviant sex chat rooms under your boss's name. Use her supervisor's email in your profile. Talk it up real dirty and before you know it, her boss's inbox will be filled with disgusting offers.”

“L = Lizards
M = Mate
A = All
O = Over

he he

These animal mags are funny!”

“Mountainchick, seroiusly, you have to watch out for her. In my experiance with my fat peice of sh!t boss, I kept all of his indescrecions to myself because I didn't want to rock the boat. Well, the manipulative !$%& got me fired, even though I was at 120% of quote while the company was loosing millions of dollars. He spread lies and rumors about me, that I didn't know about until the day his boss fired me. It turns out, the the peice of sh!t who ruined a budding career was fired 3 months later for: stealing money from the company, using his expense account on strip clubs and running up a $5,000 alcohol tab at 1 of his local bars.

I learned my lesson, and if I spot any a$$hole tendencies in a boss, or inept manager, I go straight over his/her head. Always protect your own a$$, never worry about anybody else in a work enviroment except yourself.”

“My principal entered my shop all of three times last year, and not once so far this (fledgling) year.

Damn, getting into education five years ago was the best move I've ever made.

...but don't get me started on the 20 years I spent in the construction industry.”

“I'm the boss--I sure hope people don't feel that way about me. Everyone is always nice to my face but one never knows.”

“mountainchick - You probably work for some level of government. People like her gravitate there and fester.

Problem with the suggestion to over her head may be that it could just irritate more people like her...the ones that put her there in the first place. So, be careful with internal whistle blowing. If she is a minority, then they will not want to rock her boat unless the case is so rock solid it could withstand the Supreme court (that is not a prejudice comment, only an observation from working for the state government for the past 19 years).

If you must do anything, document stuff and keep it at home. Anything in your desk belongs to your employer.

Also consider the following:

1. Keep your nose clean and transfer to another department.
2. No personal email, letters, or papers in your desk.
3. MINIMAL personal calls at work.
4. Find a mentor within the organization. Look around and find someone outside your department who is savvy and you can ask for career advice on a confidential basis. Sometimes these people can help you more than you know.
5. Find out if your company/organization has an ombudsman or internal/external whistleblowing procedure.
6.Don't surf animal porn sites at work.”

“lol at #6 phil

For the record, I have never, nor will I ever partake or view in animal porn.”

“MMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

er... I heartily concur!

Everyone should have a boss like Mary Phyl!”

“The word 'boss' is a backwards double s. o. b.”

“One of the advantages of being self-employed ...

Mountainchick, I think your boss is jealous of you. You're young and attractive and she's ugly as hell. Seeing you reminds her of what she is and is not.

Just like lots of folks were jealous of Newgirl and ran her off
(even if she was actually a guy in drag), so your boss may try to run you off. It's disgusting as hell and will make you sick if it happens, but just remember that overall you are much better off than the losers who retaliate against those they are jealous of.

Oh, ... did I say you're cute?”

“How funny steve. Do you really think she was driven off because of jealousy? How about because she was tacky?”

“Very true steve”

“I've always worked in very small companies where personal accoutability was extremely high. Cause of that we were always able to weed out the undesireable quickly. Now I'm an internet contractor at a huge corporation and the amount of incompetence and butt-covering is staggering. The full timers hate the contractors cause we make a load more than them and we get overtime so every thing we do is under a microscope. The place I'm at is a huge bank and it bugged me so bad I made sure to cancel every account I had with that bank and their subsideraries.”

“My boss has a really long terrible combover and a signed print of the Washington Redskins Cheerleaders. It is all wrinkled because he had to get it out of the trash can at home. He takes it golfing with him so he can show other men.”

“I'm with you MaryPhyl- time to start browsing forums and see what my crew is saying, about me :-) As for my boss, I don't think he really knows much, about what I do, so he just leaves me alone... kind of a nice possition to be in.”

“My only boss is a carpenter.








What the heck am I saying??? I'm Buddhist!”

“I think Violin's about to go postal.”

“about to?”

“Hmmmmm... Now you've got me wondering.. I was an employee for a long time before I was the boss.. I try to treat my employees like I would have liked to have been treated... but... you never know... Maybe I should ask them casually which forums they like?? :-)”

“mountainchick, I am always looking for good help. What type of work do you do? What type of work are you willing to do?”

“So QUIT, tell her what you think, IYHO, and walk. Come on and join me I off for another year or so, Life is short! Yo bear!”

“Yeah mountainchick, quit...I don't understand why people work with bosses/supervisors or lots of co-workers they do not get along with. If it's just 1 or 2 co-workers...just grin and bear it. But if the majority of the workers don't like you...maybe the problem is you.
If the boss is an a-hole to everyone, everybody should quit at the same time...that will put her/him in a jam. And this is advice from a boss!!! Obviously I'm hoping that I have a good relationship with my workers, so this won't happen to me.”

“Stan, me and the fellas were wondering about that payraise?”

“OK bacpac, here's the scoop...my salary went up by 40%...you guys should tighten your belts for the next few years. Now get back to work!!! lol”

“Mountainchick: I'm extremely sympathetic, however I wouldn't focus on her looks or weight, as those likely have nothing to do with her competence as a boss. They may have relevance to your relationship on a personal basis if she does feel badly because you are fit and she isn't -- self-loathing doesn't improve temperment -- but if she clearly senses some level of personal revulsion from you, she will likely be defensive and eventually antagonistic.

Incompetent bosses tend toward growing levels of insecurity, and your competence (we are all honest with ourselves about that, it's only our bosses who haven't got a clue, right?) will be threatening enough, without you rubbing it in (even with subtle non-verbal signals, let alone whispering behnd her back) that you are physically superior.

I've been fired twice by real twits, both involving abusive employment practices that I resisted. But I didn't make it an issue over looks. On that matter, you might avoid her petty level and be compassionate about her "Brillo" hair. Focus on how you can strategically and tactically deal with her poor leadership and get your work done until you find a new position, inside or outside your organization.”

“Perhaps some industrial strength conditioner would "soften" her outlook towards you Mountainchick.”

“If you do quit, I don't recommend burning bridges by telling her off or writing a negative letter of resignation. If you quit, do so graciously--thanking them for the opportunity to learn and grow--and with two weeks notice (In situations where you KNOW you are being set up as a scapegoat, then I would alter that timeframe... clean out your desk before they can plant evidence). You never know when a burned bridge can come back to haunt you...maybe years later!! (Details upon request)”

“pekka, impressive point of view.”

“Thanks for all of the great and funny advise. Just a few things. . .Yes, Pekka, I agree with you but I have to admit, this woman angered me in a way unlike any other boss I have ever had. Ripping her apart physically along with her managerial skills, just helped me paint a better picture of the image that I have of this woman. I do not tend to cut others down because of their physical attributes and if my references to bad hair and excess weight offends anyone here, I'm sorry. :( To me, she is just awful. I am simply venting about what I view as her flaws and yes, physically I do consider her flawed. In fact, she has made comments about my physical attributes before. In that, I infer that she s pretty insecure about herself so I know that she has issues about her appearance.
I do work in a form of Government. I work for a school system as a buyer/construction contract administrator. I have stayed in this position because of 4 reasons. 1. I've managed to increase my salary in this position by $9k this past year in this position. 2. With all of the layoffs taking place right now, working for a school system offers a great deal of job security. 3. I'm good at what I do and I have established a solid repuation throughout the district and amongst my clients and fellow project managers. 4. I work with some of the most awesome people I have ever had the pleasure of working with. . .ever. So for the most part, I do like my job. I was just having one of those "I wanna go home and cry" knd of days.

If I didn't have little ones that depend on me, I suppose my life would be going in a different direction and I might settle for a job that might not pay as much but leaves me satisifed in other ways. I think I would try to find some way to be a writer or I'd love to work as a reporter. Oh yeah, speaking of writing, if anyone's interested, I'll be posting a trip report on my 14'er site about Grays Peak on Monday.

Man, I gotta go to bed!”

“Kids change your whole outlook on your job, doesn't it?! I could make a little bit more money elsewhere, not 9K, but I have a wonderful boss. She understands when I miss a week of work because my kids are home sick. She understands when I have to miss work to drive my kids across the state for visitation.

Of course, she's also my favorite sister. When I was little my mom would sometimes lock me in the house so she could get away with her friends. When she went to college, she let me come and stay with her for a week. She loves my children like her own and she was my coach when my son was born. Thank God for family!”

“I sleep with my boss. Seriously!
Susan has been my boss at work now for over a year.
Talk about Kissin butt! OH YEAH!!”

“I also hat my boss and was reminded of it yesterday when I asked for moer hours. She goes off on how she cant give me more hours and blah blah blah blah. i told her that Im not even getting what I was promised when I started. The only reason why I stay at my job is because I get paid good and because it works ok with my schedule as a student, I never get to go hiking now that school has started, but I will graduate this year. But anyway my boss is a loser”

“Ah, Mountainchick, you may have something to work with. If she has made comments about your physical attributes, I would keep detailed notes of what was said, when, and around who. If she continues to make remarks which are inappropriate to discussions of task or job performance (and how you look or what your body is like rarely qualify as appropriate) you may have the basis for a sexual harrassment case. The courts have established that such cases do not require the parties be of opposite sexes. Having such material and indicating you are willing to use it (should she ever start threatening you) may give you some leverage. Just be careful not to respond in kind, and to begin a pattern of telling her you find such comments inappropriate and offensive (and tell her so in front of a witness if possible).”

“Options,Choices, Consiquences.

Choose your battle and fight to the DEATH!
or

Walk away. Your choice.”

“Is outta here!

See Ya!”

“I know who is in charge!!!”

“LOL! Hang in there Gurly! I was having similar thoughts a couple weeks ago. I was the only person here, trying to man a 24 hour operation. 14 hour days for 6 days straight and Gallons of coffee.

You can do it!”

“LOL...if it was easy everyone could do it.”

“I like my job most days but it seems today is my day to be "the target". Grrrr!!!”